T.I. Cover

Alter-egos - they're the new way of the world. I found mine quite a while ago. He really comes in handy around tax season.

Thank you to Fresh for debuting this photoshop fiasco for the world to see. Not only is the cover lame, but it's been done. Hop off, T.I.!

Chongalicious

Ladies and gentlemen, I introduce to you the legendary "Chongalicious". Okay, quick history lesson: This song was created by two 17-year old Michael M. Krop Senior High students here in Miami. Their names are Laura DiLorenzo and Mimi Davila. Ever since its emergence, "Chongalicious" has become a local hit, spinning on Power 96 radio more than a 50 Cent record.

Originally, I thought this shit was ignorant as hell, but now I can admit that it is actually really funny. Jiggle them lovehandles, girls! Do it for all the chongas in Hialeah! Shout out to Think2Wice for bringing the video to my attention.

Oh Bitch Please

The Game is shooting off his mouth again. He claims that his 3rd album will be his last, for he wants to spend more time with his family, and he's done what he needed to, and the fish don't fry in the motherfuckin' kitchen. Jayceon is so notorious for saying things just for the sake of it, then doing the complete opposite. I doubt he is being truthful, but if he is, good riddance.

WTF Files

I know I took a while to get back in action. Forgive me, but this year's Memorial Day weekend was a long, exhausting, bag of shit. People always question my reasons for hating Miami. Reason number 231: You can always count on some Negroes to come to town and show their asses (literally). Here are a few photos captured from this weekend of drunken fools and their ambiguous behavior.

Jesus be a plane ticket.

[Continue Viewing These Coons...]

Signed, Annoyed

To my beloved readers,

No, I'm not shutting The Fury down - never that! However, as most of you know, we are set in the middle of Memorial Day Weekend and Miami is packed to it's geographical brim. I can't stand out-of-towners, but we have to deal with them. I will be working a lot of these meaningless events most of the weekend and won't have time to post anything up. I might not be present on the coming Monday either. Sorry, folk. Have no fear, though. If I see Beyonce throw her guts up inside the club, I will let you all know.

I Vote No

Jacki-O looks like a dirty ass retired prostitute trying to get back in the game for weed money. Like her sweat alone can melt the flesh from your bones. Eww! I haven't heard too much from Jack since the shoplifting incident, but it looks like she's got a new mixtape out. The question is: Do you care?

Didn't think so.

Rihanna Live in England

I guess all of those "ellas" finally caught up to Forehedda's digestive tract, because she was singing like she had a mean dookie on it's way out of you-know-where.

I'm kidding.

I thought her little performance was cute. Congratulations must go Rihanna's way for being the first female artist with a single to go #1 in the UK on downloads alone. The British know what they like, and that's scalp.

Big ups to That Grape Juice!

New Artist: Girlfriend

Hailing from my own home state of Florida, Girlfriend is the newest female R&B trio to hit the scene. Jacksonville ladies, Chante, Nina, and Bree have been grinding together as a vocal clique for a minute. Now let's be honest; girl groups don't last very long...ever. Regardless, Girlfriend has a presence, style, and sound that grabs my attention. Their single "JuicyFruit" is the perfect illustration of a dominant dame's club smash. It retains a very sensual rhythm, yet stays true to the Southern beat that we all love to bounce to. I feel that these chicks will blow soon enough. What do you all think?

Play Me: Girlfriend - JuicyFruit (feat. Rudy B)

Check their Myspace!

.. Rumor Mill ..

Has Diddy been beating up his employees?

Sean (Diddy) Combs' top choreographer - who took a star turn on the rap mogul's MTV reality show "Making the Band" - has accused him of threatening her with a chair during a heated argument that ended their partnership.

Laurie Ann Gibson filed a complaint with the NYPD claiming Diddy picked up a chair and menaced her with it during an argument over the lackluster performance of the TV show's latest group of contestants.

Sources close to Diddy denied he grabbed the chair, and they insisted the argument was part of the theatrics of the TV show and that Gibson overreacted.

Diddy's lawyer simply rejected the allegations. [ source ]

Word also has it that MTB's celebrity judge, Michael Bivins, snatched up poor Boom Kat and held her in place while Diddy attempted to bust her ass. MTV supposedly has it all on tape. This story kind of reminds me of the time my neighbor threw a rock at his son's mother in the midst of an argument outside. May he rest in peace.

.. Quick Quote ..

"My whirlpool is bigger than Cam’s swimming pool.
And he shouldn’t be in front of no camera with daisy dukes on.”

It didn't take very long for 50 Cent to get at my girl Miss Info with his reaction to Cam'ron's poolside bitching. As you can see, he said some pretty mean things (daisy dukes, why didn't I think of that?).

As lame as this shit is, aren't you anxious to see how Cam will respond? Maybe he'll record a diss record in the last stall of a KFC restroom, or something.

.. New Music ..

Play Me: Lauryn Hill - Lose Myself
No, your eyes aren't decieving you - L-Boogie has recorded a new track. It's called "Lose Myself", and it is off of the soundtrack for Columbia Pictures' animated film, Surf's Up. Granted, this is not the world famous Lauryn Hill sound we all know and love (it's more pop/rock/reggae, I'd say), it still has a refreshing feel and hearing Ms. Hill's voice again is always joyous. Fugees album, anyone?

Play Me: Cassie - Sometimes (feat. Ryan Leslie)
Guess who's biz-ack? It's the NextSelection Princess, who is busy working on her sophmore album. Here is a slice of the work in progress. "Sometimes" features Cassie's mack daddy, Ryan Leslie, who really believes he can rap. What a schmuck. Well, he also believes that Cassie can sing and in case your wondering, she still can't do that. Let us hope that this isn't her first single.

[Continue Reading...]

Play Me: Amy Winehouse - Rehab (Remix f. Jay-Z)
The rumored Amy Winehouse/Jay-Z collabo is prepared for you all. Yeah, I have exclaimed my admiration for Amy the Alchie and sure, I'm a fan of Hov, but I don't like this remix at all. My ears gave it a chance; it just doesn't sound right to me. Jay did a decent job lyrically, but I don't think that he makes a good team with WineCooler.

Play Me: DJ Khaled - We Takin' Over (Remix f. R.Kelly, T-Pain, Lil Kim, & Young Jeezy)
Before I even start a review here, let me just say this. If I hear T-Pain or R.Kelly on one more damn song, I might just eat my own face (don't worry, I'll find a way). Now, DJ Khaled is doing it so big this year and Miami couldn't be prouder. His single We Takin' Over is a smash hit just about everywhere. It lead to a female version (that we shalt not speak of...garbage), but this one is an official remix. It feels so good to hear Lil' Kim on record again.

Shoutout to Rap-Up.com!

I Vote Hell No

What...in the concentrated fuck...was Cam'ron thinking when he made this video? Okay, so 50 Cent poked fun at him a little bit on 106 & Park, but Fif is a bully. We know that. So what, if you got clocked in the eye by Tru Life? It has happened to the best of us. There is still no excuse for you to be outside making videos in your drawers, Cam. Crack is wack!

50 Cent - Amusement Park

Okay, I've got a new 50 Cent video for you - please, try to control your excitement. This is the footage to "Amusement Park", that was rumored to be banned from MTV and all kinds of mess. Well, it wasn't banned, but it should've been for all the exceeding levels of boring spewing from it. When will 50 keep his shirt on in a video?

Check out the video for "Straight to the Bank" below!

[Continue Reading...]

I don't understand this piece of shit at all. We are introduced to all these characters like there was a story to be told afterwards, and guess what? There wasn't, and what the hell were Golden Brooks and her snout doing in the video?

Amy Winehouse - Back to Black

I absolutely love the drunken bag of bones that is Amy Winehouse. Her album Back to Black is exactly what I need in my life. I just sit in my living room and let it blast in the stereo while smoking a candy cig and munching on a box of Krispy Kremes - heaven! So, here's the new video by Amy entitled "Back to Black". Um...fantastico!

God, I wish I was her drug dealer.

Who Gives A Shit?

I'm about to take it back to some old school Fury. Bear with me.

Okay, how many of you think that Usher's little cuddle buddy, Tameka Foster, is really a big ol' tranny? Yep, thought so. The media is really enthralled by their nauseating love story and I don't seem to understand why. It's not like Usher is doing it big in music right now and, well, Tameka is ugly as hell, so why the fuss? Maybe its me, but they have got to be one of the wierdest couples ever. Usher must be getting thrown around at home. I mean, doesn't she look like she could benchpress her own weight in porkchops? Ewww. I don't know why people find them interesting.

BTW: I gotta give a big shout-out to my homeboy FreezeFiya for shouting me out at AllHipHop.

.. New Music ..

Play Me: Murphy Lee - Hatin' (feat. Young Dro)

The last time I heard from Murphy Lee, he was arrested for smoking kush in his ride on the way to the titty bar...fool. I guess he's been set free, because he's in the studio recording new tracks. This particular record is decent. Nothing to brag about, Murph. It may get a couple radio spins and a drop in the local club, but all will be forgotten after about a week. Try harder, Lunatic.

Play Me: Solange - ChampagneChronicNightcap

For too long has Solange been the Jan Brady of the Killer Knowles Klan (KKK). Once again it is time for her to throw the Huggies to the side and try her hand out at the singing thing. Unfortunately, she still sucks. Her voice isn't exactly Beyonce-esque. I thought my brain cells were going to disintegrate towards the end of the song. On top of that, the bitch sings, "light the dro", in the hook. Well, isn't she a grown woman now? I guess we know who Baby Daniel is bringing that weed home to.

[Continue Reading...]

Play Me: Amerie - That's What U Are

I've never been one to go ga-ga over Amerie. Her single, "One Thing", was the only thing that made her stand out to me. However, this track here is a very good one. It's very sexy; like one of those old kinky Janet Jackson hits. Again, it's nothing outstanding, but it's satisfying.

Play Me: Rick Ross - Represent 4 The South (f. Lil' Wayne & Young Jeezy)

This Rick Ross record is the shit! I'm not just saying that because he's from Miami, because I really don't like most of our artists anyway. Now, I'm not sure if this is off of an upcoming album from Ross, but it should be. The beat is a certified Chevy-riding anthem, and perfect for the clubs. One downside though - Lil' Weezy lyrically stole the whole track...once again.

Mad Black Woman

So, here's the deal: Some computer nerds with very unfulfilling lives got a hold of a few Ol' Dirty Bastard sound bites and used them to play a prank call on some lady from New York. It is so funny to hear how she reacts to Dirty's electrical fussing. She was pissed! Check it out.

Shout to HNNLive.com for the clip!

Who's Up Next?

Bossip.com dropped a report that Irv Gotti was recently seen prancing around Kim Kardashian's California boutique. We all know that the negro can't afford to buy anything, so he must have been there for some other reason; probably to jump on the Ho Train. I mean, all the cool kids are doing it.

Anyway, I hear that Kim's cooch is so stretched out at this point, that she can finally fulfill her goal of transporting inner-city LA youth into Beverly Hills by way of her uterus. There, they can learn to film sex tapes and become big superstars. See, the sluttiness is for a good cause.

.. New Music ..

It's been a long day, my friends. I'm about ready to curl up in front of my TiVo with a Capri Sun so I can rest my butt away.

Before, I get into all that, I have to introduce you to Kelly Rowland's new single, "Comeback". I actually like it. It has a very bouncy feel to it; lots of choreographic potential. The track was produced by everyone's favorite albino python, Scott Storch. Hopefully, Columbia Records will release Kelly's damn album, so I can check out the rest of her tunes. Baby Daniel's album is probably gonna drop before her's, hell!

Play Me: Kelly Rowland - Comeback
(shout out to That Grape Juice for the linkage!)

Thanks for reading! Have a great weekend err'body!

There's No "O" In Team

Bow Wow and Omarion are joining forces to produce an album together this year. And here I was thinking that the heartthrob days were coming to a close. I guess pretty never sleeps.

"Me and O have been trying to put this together for so many years, and now we’ve got the opportunity to do it,” Bow Wow says. “We’re in the creative process right now, still trying to come up with a title and everything. Me and him are coming up with ideas daily, so the process is gonna go real smooth. We’re anxious to get in the studio together and make this whole thing happen.” [ Rap -Up ]

Well, I was going to keep this a secret for a while, but now is a good time to let you all know. I will be teaming up with my homeboy Dig'Em the Smacks Frog for an album we are tentatively naming Cereal & Bitches Part 1. Sick shit on the way!

.. Rumor Mill ..

Sorry, for the lack of posts yesterday. I was at Mansion Nightclub all day long for the I Love NY Casting Call trying to get on Season 2. No luck, though. The directors said I didn't have the "flutter" they were looking for. Damn.

Anyway, I've been keeping my ear to the Miami streets and there is loose talk of a new diss record in the works. This time it is Trina who wants to bash 50 Cent! I managed to soak up this info: 50 was making some foolish remarks about Trina on his record "Fully Loaded Clip" and implied that she was messing around with Young Buck. This got Da Baddest Bitch heated and urged her to smash Fif on wax.

I have yet to hear this supposed diss track, but inside sources are saying that Trina herself confirmed that its coming. I guess she won't need any of these. Get 'em girl!

Lil' Cease Caught Naked

Not Safe For Work (shit...not safe at all).

Lil' Cease is still talking shit about people and for some reason he decided to go after French of Cocaine City. Never heard of 'em? Doesn't matter, you'll probably never have to again. Anyway, after making his comments, Frenchy released footage of Cease dancing around some hotel room butt ass naked with his male friends cheering him on! If your going to watch, I would advise you to keep a barf-bag and a bottle of Visene close by for your own safety.

Shouts out to the good folk at WorldStarHipHop.com for the videos.

Rihanna Loves The Kids

Def Jam wants you, the listener, to know that Rihanna is not just a sultry island gal with a knack for coochie popping - oh no! Underneath that massive skull lives the brain of a young woman who loves to give back. She did just that at yesterday's "Links For Life" Gala to benefit DKMS and The Bone Marrow Foundation. I think Rihanna deserves a free panty liner for her sweet-heartedness!


[Continue Reading...]

Oh Bitch Please

So, the two nutbirds actually decided to go through with it. Must be something in the water.

Congrats to actor Nick Cannon who proposed last night to his Victoria’s Secret hottie Selita Ebanks. The couple, who attended the Metropolitan Museum of Art Costume Gala, were chauffeured in a Rolls Royce Phantom to Times Square where Nick proposed to his girl on one knee with a 12-carat diamond ring. Now that’s a rock!

The proposal was projected on the giant MTV jumbo-tron were the words, "Selita will you marry me?" [ source ]

I hate to be the rotten mother-in-law in this situation, but come the fuck on! These fools just met each other in February. IT'S MAY!

Something ain't right. Whatever. The sex must be good and we all know Nick is as dumb as a box of rocks, so there you have it.

T.I. Gets Pissed

T.I. held a performance on the Bentley College campus up in Massachusetts a few weeks back and everything seemed to be going well - that is, until somebody pegged his ass with a water balloon. Then shit got ugly. Cliff started cursing at an unknown target and offered $50,000 to any fan who would point the suspect out.

My opinion: It was probably just a desperate young lady dying to see that remarkable body of Tip's glistening with H2O (sarcasm).

Furious Flicks

A number of big names in Hip-Hop showed out in Las Vegas this weekend for the De La Hoya vs Mayweather fight (I was rooting for De La Hoya and I don't give a damn), but the big party happened at the grand opening of the TAO Beach Club later that night. The evening's festivites were hosted by El Presidente, Jay-Z, and there were appearances by artists such as Diddy, 50 Cent, Usher, Jermaine Dupri, and even Nelly crawled out of Ashanti's vagina to join the fun. I hear the whole jam went down without a knife or bullet in anyone's ass. Thumbs up!

Check out some more pics below!

[Continue Reading...]

Cam'ron Kicked From Dipset!

Have any other Diplomat fans noticed that Cam'ron and Jim Jones are hardly ever seen together anymore? They tried to bamboozle me with some "we-are-all-at-peace" bullshit, but Miss Info has finally brought the truth to the light. This is what Jimmy had to say:

"Me and Cam’ron havent spoken to each other in a year….There are so many times that dude did me and Juelz dirty. But I kept quiet out of loyalty, I felt like if we cant be friends then at least we can do business together….But now I can’t be next to you….I’m threw wit being in hot water because of you….we got to put Cam on punishment for a while. Now you’re the black sheep….We still the Diplomats. We worked too hard to achieve our own success and now we’re gonna have to do something new…" [ source ]

How sad - to just throw away a friendship like that.

I blame myself. Maybe if I never started this disrespectful blog, none of this would have happened....oh well, see ya'll on Monday!

I Vote No

You know what? I have no words for these women, but they need to get it together. I know they belong to one of you. Call up your cousins and let them know that they owe me a new heart and I want it by Monday or all hell will break loose.

.. Rumor Mill ..

Life has been hard for a certain Busta Rhymes. Not only was he arrested on DUI charges just this morning, but now I hear that he is taking a dip with The Source Magazine in The Pool of Bankruptcy. Rumor has it that Busta Buss isn't earning enough to pay his bills and plans on filing later this week. Poor guy. Maybe if he pawns off some of those big ass chains he wears, he can get back in the game.

On a personal note: I probably shouldn't be picking on these guys. My pockets aren't exactly on swole. I think a moth flew out of my wallet yesterday.

Sucks To Be You

The Source Magazine was once considered to be Hip-Hop's Bible. Now it's just a broke, boring, pile of shit collecting dust in the Express aisle at Winn-Dixie. So predictably, the publication has filed bankrupt. Aww...

The Source magazine and Source Entertainment Inc. filed for Chapter 11 bankruptcy in Manhattan Friday after shady business practices from the magazine's former management caused advertisers to pull out, according to court papers.

With Friday's filing, the publication also converted and consolidated a previous Chapter 7 filing and listed assets of about $1.3 million and liabilities of $35 million, reports the Associated Press. [ source ]

Can't say I care, really. I still have XXL, VIBE, Miss Info, and Crunk & Disorderly to soothe me when I need a Hip-Hop fix. The world keeps on spinnin'.

New Music: Tiffany Evans

It's been a while since those amazing perfomances on Star Search, and after nabbing a role in Tyler Perry's Diary of a Mad Black Woman, Tiffany Evans is finally ready to blow up! With two records, both produced by The Clutch team and one featuring Ciara, I could not be any more excited about this girl's upcoming debut. Not only does Tiffany have a powerful voice, but she uses her music to raise that voice on topics that young women need to listen to. Go Tiffany! I promise not to diss you on this site...well not yet.

Play Me: Tiffany Evans - Promise Ring (f. Ciara)

Play Me: Tiffany Evans - Girl Gone Wild

MIMS - Like This/Just Like That

I really like MIMS, and while I appreciate his attempt at originality with this video, I'm sure that I just broke the world record for "Longest Yawn by an Afro-American". That shit was boring. I mean - breakdancing? Get it together, Capitol.

Oh Bitch Please!

Naomi Campbell is at it again. It seems that the supermodel is blaming her fighting, yelling, and other mounts of craziness on alcoholic allergies. Say what?

“I choose not to drink today in my life because I find that I’m allergic to alcohol. I’m not someone that’s in denial of my problems and I’m not going to lie about my problems and I’m not hiding my problems.” [ source ]

Well, maybe she's right. Lord knows, I had a few sips of Captain Morgan last weekend at Prive' and started bashing bottles over every head in sight. That's definitely different than just being a drunk...definitely.

Diary of a Tired Black Man

Here's an uplifiting piece for the fellas. I just love the sound of an ignorant person's face shattering across the floor, don't you? Take a look see!

Thanks to Mike Brown The REMIX for the clip!

Bitchin' & Moanin'

Usher is a little upset at the likes of R&B crooners, such as Chris Brown, Omarion, and Ne-Yo. You know, on a "pay homage to an OG" tip. Check his quote:

"You got your artists who find their way through the circuit and are following and are not giving the respect where the respect is due. "If you know (you're) following and biting, then, hey, give the respect. You can't come around here and think that you're really starting the game. Understand, when I came up in the game and I found a trail, I was cool. "Bobby Brown went this way, Michael Jackson went this way, Marvin Gaye, he created his little profile and he held to it. I didn't step on those toes. "What I did was find a way and my thing and created my thing. Now you have my thing being built. So I look up, and I'm like, 'OK, I see you all. I see you all in the videos. I see you moving, I get it, but pay the respect." [ source ]

I suppose he's looking for someone to kiss that ATL ass of his. Don't worry Usher! I appreciate you, and I am sending you over a tall drink fit for an R&B king of your caliber.

I Vote No

During my frantic scurrying around Biscayne Boulevard at Saturday's Radio One Springfest Concert, I caught a glimpse of MIMS, Trick Daddy, Eve, and a crackhead doing the electric slide to an Omarion record - some fun! However, I somehow managed to miss the hot ass mess that was Yung Joc and that very large piece of jewelry that he's trying to pass off as his own. Negro, get real.

Just in case you're wondering; that's a picture of Spongebob Squarepants that Joc had painted on the side of his scalp. Please don't ask me - I don't get it at all. He should have splattered Nick Jr.'s Franklin on there, because they look like twins!