Chopped & Screwed

[Photo via Dee @ Cake & Ice Cream ]

Ludacris was one of many great performers at last week's KUBE 93 SummerJam concert, and he showed up with quite an altered look. He stuffed a T-shirt in his back pocket - I mean, who still does that? Oh yeah, and he cut his hair. I guess he got tired of riding down to the southside to get braided up by Aquanaisha every weekend, so he just chopped the locks off. Admittedly, I did believe the man was going to look stupid when I heard he did this. I expected like a raggedy $5 buzz-cut or something, but the new look fits him. However, it does make his nose look bigger than ever before, no?

You can also see Luda rockin his mini-mini-fro in the video for his new single, "Moneymaker", which he is currently shooting right here in the MIA.

Bitchin' Out

Yeah, Yeah, I know what I said about the vacation, but this shit was irking the hell out of me. Besides, I can't escape my one true love. Alright, let's get down to business.

Letoya Luckett's self-titled solo album was released on Tuesday as you should already know and was expected to move major units. So, refusing to have any attention taken away from her (especially by her ex-bandmate), Be-Yawn-Ce' and her camp placed a pre-order option on iTunes for her upcoming album B'Day on the same week of Letoya's debut. Now I don't wanna hear any fucking excuses from you Knowles fanatics, because the bitch knew what she was doing. It was an evil move in means to knock the spotlight off of Letoya and sadly enough, the shit worked. I think Ms. Thing has been hanging around Fraggle Rock for way too long and he's tutoring her on a couple of his dastardly deeds of musical sabotage.

Since I'm already on the topic, I'll just mention something else that I noticed. Ever since Destiny's Child announced that they weren't going to be a group any longer, it seems like all the ex-members have been flying to recording studios on rocketships. First we had the young lady above, now her girl LaTavia Robinson is preparing an album after she claimed she was done with the music indsutry. Also, a female by the name of Támar Davis is hitting the scene after departing from the group back in "Girls Tyme" days. Seems like the rejects are strappin down their wigs and preparing for war. Somebody needs to call Farrah Franklin and give that bitch some inspiration as well.

Hello, my minature fanbase. I just thought I owed it to the 4 people who actually read this shit to let them know that I am taking a break from The Fury for a couple weeks. A nigga is on a well-deserved vacation right now and I'm not trying to leave the beach for nothing. Don't fret, for I will be back to chop it up with ya'll and crush these celebrities' feelings soon enough. Anyway, the bar is calling my name right now, so I'll holla! Check out Crunk & Disorderly and Juicy News until I return.

The Violence Continues

I might have been wrong about Loon getting his ass whooped up in Harlem, because according to the hood, he's got a good set of hands on him. Of course, when asked about the altercation between him and 40 Cal, he claimed he "beat the shit" out of him. I'm sorry, I just find that so hard to believe. Maybe it's because he smiles so damn much, like he just got two gumballs out the machine in front a bodega with one quarter. This is what 4o Cal had to say about the fight and Loony Toon's comments:

"I'm a tell niggas the real story, cause I'm a real nigga. I'm in the barbershop, me and Loon got the same barber, he's from the hood. Prior to the incident I'm about to explain- I ain't see the nigga in like two years, I heard he moved to Atlanta or some shit. So I'm getting my hair lined-up or whatever by the barber, here comes Loon walking in. He walks and talks to some of the barbers, they all cool, this shit is like that show 'The Shop', you feel what I'm saying? Everybody know each other and all that, just cool shit.

I'm getting my cut (and) this nigga comes in and he says my name like in a joking way like "Yo 40" like he saying what up to me. I said nothing. I continued getting my cut. He's mad with a couple people in back of me, I dont know, they talking or whatever. Loon is in back of them, he grabs a shovel from the closet and out of nowhere he swings while I'm getting my line-up and he hits me in the shoulder. So I get up looking at him, he swings again, I block it with my arm and snuff em. He dropped the shovel and I threw 'em in the chairs. He's under me, cause I threw him in the chairs and he tries to pick me up. He almost picks me up, but I snuffed him again, so he dropped me. He falls off me then niggas break it up.

I tell the nigga 'Let's take it outside, lets fight again', like you know let's get it over with, you got some shit on ya chest. The nigga grabs the shovel again. I say 'You can't fight without the shovel', the nigga drops the shovel, go runs and jumps in some little hooptie. I didn't start laughing, I'm still mad at what the fucks going on. I just go finish getting my line and call a couple of my niggas and call it a day. He wasn't nowhere to be found for the day, so that's the story.

I mean if a nigga wanna get points off of that, cause he mad at Jimmy so he try to get at me and try to get a point, he got nothing, he lost points. I heard he broke his pinkie after the whole incident. Got a few marks on his face or some dumb shit from the couple jabs I gave em. Me? it's nothing wrong with me, like it's verified, I done took a couple pictures, I'm about to do another video. I might make another mixtape called 'Don't beat me in my head' Volume 1. So whatever, I'll see em when I see em ya dig, it's nothing."

Well his story matches up very well with the one the witness told over on AllHipHop.com and it is quite detailed. So, I'm sticking to my original theory.

.. Rumor Mill ..

What The Club's Been Missing:
Ya know, violence seems to flock to the Dipset camp like Al Reynolds does to penis. I don't get it. I heard that a massive fight broke out at the Crocodile Rock club in PA this week, when Juelz Santana failed to perform as scheduled. Apparently 'Elz showed up a little early and demanded to be let onstage when the opening act was still performing. Some idiot promoter denied his wishes, so Lil' Boy Fresh and the rest of the Dips...well, dipped. From there the aforementioned riot ensued leaving four fans injured and two behind bars.


The Meth Tical Expericence:
I heard Method Man went up to Wendy Williams' studio to confront her on the situation concerning her reporting the private info of his sick wife, but he was not let in. Wendy did say that she'd like to have him come up and speak to her, but I don't think that's a good idea. Meth is liable to punch the collagen out of Wendy's face.

Bachelor Parties All Around:
It seems as though everyone is getting married in the fall. Rumor has it that Janet & Jermaine will tie the knot in September. Also, Eddie Murphy & Melanie Brown (aka Scary Spice) are rumored to be having a September wedding. I guess some people can find love anywhere. Then, of course, Jay-Z & Beyoncé get married every month, so look out for the bouquets ladies. Just make sure you wipe the K-Y Jelly off if you're gonna attend Eddie's.

That's the Rumor Mill. Mild, I know. Gossip has been flat lately. Somebody find Kobe a white girl!

Been A Minute

In a haste to gain more positive attention to Bad Boy Entertainment from us music fans, Diddy has actually gotten his executive ass back in the booth and recorded his new album called, Press Play. Here's the first single, "Come To Me" featuring the beautiful Nicole Scherzinger of The Pussycat Dolls. It seems like Diddy is trying with all his might to sound 23 years young again. Aww. Well, according to the music industry you're a geezer now, Mr. Combs. Deal with it. Oddly enough, I'm really enjoying this new track. It has just the right mix of today's flavor with the old swagger Diddy's always given us. Let's just pray that he's gotten over that damn shoulder wop that he's been doing since like '94. I don't know if my retinas can bear to witness that dance in another video.

Press Play should be on shelves by October 3rd.

.. Sit Down ..

Guess who's remaking 50 Cent's record, "How To Rob".

"I'm jacking everybody. Even 50 and [Lil] Jon — they getting it too. At first I wasn't into talking about anybody...but I remember back in the day when a nigga ain't had nothing. He would do anything to get a little paper. I want to be where real hip-hop is. A lot of people say hip-hop is dead. Well, I'mma kill it for 'em. You gotta think: I'm a dude who can get crunk and spit," ~Lil' Scrappy

Nigga, sit your ass down! You mean you're actually admitting to using diss records to promote yourself? Why does everybody want to be 50 Cent? First it's Chris Brown's pokemon collecting ass, now this nigga. How pathetic can one person possibly be? Scrap', please go find yourself a hobby because your career is over. Your mouth look like you been suckin on lemons for a living.

Harlem Block Bout

I guess Loon hasn't been too cool with Dipset ever since Jim Jones aired out his post-record deal hustle to some DVD magazine. So, I heard that he and Diplomat member, 40 Cal, got into a scuffle at a barbershop in Harlem. The witness' stories of the fight and it's outcome are all very different, but from what I gather, Loon actually swung a shovel at Cal while he was getting shaped up, which hit his shoulder. From there the two fought around the shop until Loon ended up leaving. I'm not sure who won, but I'd bet my money on Cal. Loon looks like he still sleeps with a Teddy Ruxpin.

Kobe Still Beggin?

If this is true, Kobe Bryant is the stupidest nigga on God's green earth. According to Illseed at allhiphop.com, the vanilla loving baller recently copped this diamond-encrusted Mercedez Benz for his wife, Vanessa. The vehicle was showcased during a car show not too long ago, so the one in the picture is probably the only one in the world, which would make this hardly likely to be proven true. Besides, Kobe could spit in Vanessa's face, slash her wrists, and piss on her mother. That bitch ain't going anywhere, so he needs to stop acting like he's sorry. He's not.

.. Sit Down ..

"I have another album I want to put out [at] the beginning of the first quarter of next year. The numbers for the album are there; I'm just workin on the commas now. Once we get the commas in the right places, everything will be cool." ~Remy Ma


Hoe, sit your ass down! First of all, you got that numbers and commas bullshit from Trina on the remix to "Concieted". That makes you a swagger jacker! Secondly, nobody really likes you. How many copies did your debut album sell? 14? Keep dreaming, Rem'. Them titties look like some depressed water balloons that nobody wanted to throw. Work on them first.

Return of the Dragon?

Much to my own dismay, I picked up on a rumor that Sisqo has finally gotten off of Ricky Martin's head & shaft and has completed a new album.

"From what I understand, Sisqo's new album is just about finished. In late June, there was a listening party at a lounge in downtown Baltimore. Supposedly, a new single titled "Who's Your Daddy?" has already been released, although I have yet to hear it on any radio station. With regard to the album, it is said to feature production from Timbaland, Nokio, and some of the in-house producers who worked on Dru Hill's albums as well as Sisqo's solo records. The album is titled "Last Dragon" and will be released on Dragon Ent. and distributed by a major label (I'm not sure exactly which one)."

What have I done to deserve this? Wait, that's probably a bad question.

When I See A Roach, I Step On It.

WEDR: 99 Jamz radio personality, K-Foxx has been preparing for her step into the worlds of modeling and acting for a while now. With the number one rated radio show in Miami, The Takeover, she has been happily energizing our evenings alongside her co-host, DJ Khaled. Now, Kay wants to show the world her other talents. She recently shot her own calender, called I'm Every Woman, where she posed as her favorite influential black women. The picture above is from July, where she is emulating the late actress/singer/dancer, Jospehine Baker. In the calender you will also find imitations of ladies like, Halle Berry, Tina Turner, and Angela Davis.

To learn more or to purchase a copy, go to KFoxxOnline.com

Not Sure I See It

You know, I guess Yung Joc really is getting famous because he's already been linked to a female celebrity. I heard it's really been going down between him and his labelmate, Cassie. According to HipHopDX, Cassie has been dating a rapper, but they weren't too sure who it was. That shows you how fly I am. I got the real dirt. The two Bad Boy artists have been seen getting all hugged up at certain parties and Joc had this to say about NextSelection's princess in this month's VIBE magazine,

"Cassie's sound and persona embody something special. She's like that fresh new fragrance everyone needs to go get. The girls wanna wear it, and dudes love it."

Now ya'll know Diddy is not having this shit. He can't have his artist's being distracted. He's so desperate, he's getting in the studio and making another album for himself. Singing, even!

After The Diss

Ludacris has been on my shit list ever since I found out that he was dissing himself in the "War With God" record. Thanks for nothing, brother. However, regardless of that idiotic stunt he pulled, he is still an amazing artist. So, today I give you his latest track; a strip-club anthem (gotta love those) called, "Moneymaker". The record features Pharrell, who also produced it. I think this was a pleasantly unexpected collaboration. I like it, but I'm still pissed at you, Luda! Hmph!

Trina Hosts Another Show

Miss Trina has not only moved on to a brand new brunette wig, but she is also in the studio working on her 4th album entitled Rockstar. In the meantime, the Miami Queen will be co-hosting the 1st Annual Ozone Magazine Awards along with David Banner on August 6th, in Orlando. This is an event I cannot wait to see. If the Source Awards are ghetto, then this shit is gonna be humiliating and I want to witness every race demeriting minute. Trina is also nominated for Best Female Artist. I hope she goes to the gym before the show, because she's gaining weight at lightning speed. The Glamorest Life must be filled with Church's Chicken and everlasting Krispy Kreme doughnuts.

Tickets to the award show are on sale now at Tickemaster.

Cassie's Got A New One

Cassandra Ventura has caught major prosperity from her first single and consistently hounded Myspace page, which has finally been pushed out of the number one artist spot on the website. Personally, I don't see what the hype over "Me & U" is about. I heard the whole song is based on her performing some multi-racial fellatio on a random guy. Not so sweet as you look, are ya'? Here's a taste of Cassie's next single, "Long Way 2 Go". I've been boppin' my head to it, so I'm still riding with you, girl. Don't disappoint me.

Megan Shows Progess

I'm happy again (get it while it lasts), because my girl is moving foward. Def Jam has finally gotten it's shit together and delivered a video for Megan Rochell's first single, "The One U Need". Too bad it sucks. Ok, I'm not happy anymore.

Bitch, You Better Have My Money!

It seemed as if things were going wonderfully for Beyoncé over the last couple of days. She had her new pathetic excuse for a video, debut this past week. The one that BET, in all it's ignorance, played every hour on Friday. Her name and face have been everywhere, but a certain someone is ready to piss in her cornflakes. Businessman, Greg Walker, has bitch-slapped Bouncy and her mommy with a $1.5 million lawsuit over the launch of her House of Dereon line. The women are being accused of breach of contract when they failed to compensate Walker enough of what he deserved after he introduced them to the firm that licensed their deal.
See, God doesn't like your video either Be'. Sorry.

The Fonz and his Fiddle

I will admit that even though Fonzworth Bentley started his career as Diddy's bitch, he's just a fun guy. He's really animated, but he's different. I actually like the dude.

Kim Brings Heat

Here's a mixtape record by Lil' Kim called "Who Shot Ya". Damn, she could've put a "part 2" at the end of the title, or at least a "2006". Whatever. She spits fire.

Missing Reality Show Lesbians

I think the GLAAD organization should leave Beenie Man and Eminem alone and go after UPN for their prejudice. The females above, Jessica of The Road to Stardom and O' So Krispie from R U The Girl, were both winners of musical talent searches on UPN and then never heard from again after that. It's obvious that these chicks like to take the occasional "nibble on the grizzle" if you dig what I'm saying. Therefore my question is, "Can lesbians survive in the music industry?". We all saw what happened to Amanda Perez. Jessica, who was signed to Missy Elliott's Goldmind Entertainment, has a voice that can give you goosebumps in record time. She's sick, I can't even hate. O' So Krispie...well, she can dance. So, where are these ladies? Ooh, I wonder if they're together?

Nah!

Enough Cryin'

Are you still clutching your hanky from the news of BET: Uncut being cancelled? Well, then dry your eyes because I may just have the news to brighten up your day.

Dipset official, Cam'ron, has been busy lately. He's got a new album, a new movie (*cough*.. shit.. *cough*), and a brand new website, KillaCamron.com. One of the site's upcoming features will be an online show called "140th and Lennox", named after Cam's original hood. The show will consist of a Top 10 countdown of the best un-cut music videos on the streets, and will be hosted by Diplomat manager, Big Joe and his "Ho of the Week". There's a title any young lady with integrity should be proud to accept. Check out Killa's site for more info on him and his low-budget ass show.

While I'm on the Dipset topic, I might as well say Happy 30th Birthday to Jim Jones!
I hear AARP coming, nigga!

Luda's Let Down

I know some of you are still coming off the Ludacris record, War With God, where it seemed that he was going hard at another unnamed rapper. Some people were losing sleep trying to figure out who he was dissing. Well, I have the answer. Here's what Chris told MTV,

"It's about me. That's what the record is about. The record is about me. A lot of people are saying a lot of things about that record. It's made a helluva impact. That record right there is so much more about me being honest about myself. And I feel it's me distinguishing myself from what a lot of the rest of the music industry is doing. I'm tired of being compared. Don't compare me to anyone; this is me. I'm confessing things about myself — this is what I do — as opposed to trying to hurt someone's feelings. I've heard a lot of subliminal things said from not only rappers but even journalists in magazines [about me]. That record is me taking soft jabs right back at them."

...

Are you fucking serious? All this time we thought you were getting back into it with T.I. or going after Rick Ross, but you were really dissing yourself? He needs to lay off the chicken & beer, because he must be losing his whole entire mind. Damn, I don't know if I'm more disappointed than I am pissed that he'd do this lame ass searching-for-his-soul shit.

Three Little Wash-ups

Ok. First of all, does anyone remember this little dark-skinned girl's name? All I remember is that she joined 3LW like 4 years ago, after the last chocolate sister chucked some Church's chicken at the other hoes and walked out. I hope she saved the biscuits. Anyway, Ms. Nameless on the right must be the laughing stock of whatever town she's from. The other two chicks hooked up with Raven "Never-ending Belly" Symone and have been collecting checks from Disney Channel for months. Meanwhile her ass is at home listening to "Players Gonna Play" and counting the days until a BET event so people can see her face again. 3LW is over, baby! Now is the time to go solo. The lite-brites will be fine.

.. Nigga of the Month ..

The Nigga of the Month title is not limited to men. It is my way of paying homage to anyone or anything that acts like...well, a nigga. Take Ms. Rhonetta Johnson for example; a big black female with a big black mouth. One view of this clip and you'll see why July's NOTM award goes to her. Bow down, bitches!

Is it just me or did that street corner really compliment Rhonetta's outfit? Congratulations, girl!

Yo! MTV Raps Sneakers

The folks over at sneaker company, Puma, have teamed up with MTV to release a new pair of kicks honoring famous hip-hop show, Yo! MTV Raps. The limited edition shoes are called Forever Fresh and part of a celebration for Puma's 25th anniversary along with their new Puma Clydes.

I actually like them. I heard that there will only be 225 pairs released; real exclusive. You should be able to grab a box on August 1st.

Chris Brown Wants To Be 50

The country is being invaded by young stars. Def Jam Records should open up an R&B babysitting agency. 17 year old, Chris Brown has been showcasing his talent to the world over the past couple months and many people seem satisfied. I'm not...not yet at least. So fresh off of his first album, this little boy says he's ready to do movies. Um...Christopher, I hope you don't think that because you can pull off a semi-impressive Michael Jackson imitated music video, that you can instantly jump into acting. It's not the same. Now, out of all the movie stars he could have gained inspiration from, he chose 50 Cent. Strike one. Look at what he had to say.

"I'm looking at some serious roles that would take me out of the kiddie — well, not kiddie — but the sweet Chris Brown that everybody knows. It would be more of a life-challenging Chris Brown, like how 50 Cent's story was [in 'Get Rich or Die Tryin' '], more along the lines of playing a role like that,"

Nigga, did you see Get Rich Or Die Tryin? I guess not. I'm sure they didn't allow you in, unless you had a parental guardian with you. 50 can't act, so aim higher. Then, what the hell does he mean he doesn't want to look "kiddie"? Boy, you're 17, you can't even buy cigarettes yet. Go audition for Spy Kids 4 and sit your ass down.

Anyway, Chris did manage to get a part in an upcoming film along with Ne-Yo (aka Go-Go). Due out by 2007, the movie is called Steppin'. So I guess he'll be playing a crack-dealer who get's shot and devotes his life to dance. I smell an Oscar.

.. Blast From The Past ..

Eureeka's Castle was a TV show about Eureeka, a sorceress in training, who lived in a giant's castle music box with her friends. The show ran on Nickelodeon from 1989 to 1995 and was written by horror writer R. L. Stine. The show was made up of different shorts that all took place with even the tiniest inhabitants of the castle. It would also at times have holiday specials and a Feature length special called Don't Touch That Box! (with Luther Vandross playing an experienced sorcerer). The show aired its regular shows during the weekday complete with cartoons and ran an abridged 30 minute version on weekends.

I can still remember those days when I'd crack open a Del Monte fruit cup and a Handi Snack and watch Eureeka along with her bizarre friends, spell words I already knew. Love this show.

Batly was so gangsta!

The CW

In a matter of weeks The CW Network will make it's launch here in America. I'm still convinced that this miserable attempt to get niggas and anglo-cracks together by merging their shows is going to blow up in the company's face. Anyhow, for those of you who are actually interested in what they have to offer, here is a schedule for the average weekly plays.

Sunday
7/6c -- Everybody Hates Chris
7:30/6:30c -- All Of Us
8/7c -- The Game
8:30/7:30 -- America's Next Top Model

Monday
8/7c -- 7th Heaven
9/8c -- Runway

Tuesday
8/7c -- Gilmore Girls
9/8c -- Veronica Mars

Wednesday
8/7c -- America's Next Top Model
9/8c -- One Tree Hill

Thursday
8/7c -- Smallville
9/8c -- Supernatural

Friday
8/7c -- Friday Night Smackdown


That's all folks! So this should give you an idea of what to expect in the fall and even more importantly, which shows have been cancelled. As much as I hate to admit it. I'm gonna miss Cuts. Marques Houston is a much better comedian than he is a singer. I never wanna see his erasable sideburns in a music video again. The scrubbed shows will still run on syndication. If you are a Miami native like me, then don't fret because the UnderPaid Negro channel will remain on-air.

For more info go to CWtv.com.

Lindsay Hohan

So, this bitch is sucking dick for crack now? I don't even feel bad for Lindsay. That dude is probably her brother.

Sin City 2 Waits On Jolie

In 2005, comic book legend, Frank Miller's popular graphic novel, Sin City, was made into a full-feature film, which grossed well over 74 million dollars. Directed by Robert Rodriguez, the movie consisted of one major plot with several mini-stories that would weave in and out of it. It became famous for it's exaggerated violence, all star cast, and most of all the black and white cell animation that gave the character's that Sunday paper look.

While Sin City 2 is currently in the pre-production stage, Rodriguez has plans on focusing the sequel on Miller's "A Dame To Kill For" storyline, with rumors of Salma Hayek, Rose McGowan, and Angelina Jolie playing the leads. The problem is that damn Brangelina baby is holding up the process. Ms. Jolie just had her first biological child and like any good mother should, she is focusing all her attention on him. Rosario Dawson, a star of the first Sin flick, believes that Angie has indeed joined the cast for part 2. In a recent interview she told IGN.com,

"I'm pretty sure [she's in it]. That's what we've basically been holding out on, because we were supposed to start that last year or earlier. I think he wanted to do that sooner rather than later, so that will probably be coming up soon…"

So we'll see what happens in the months to come. Rosario will also be starring in Clerks 2, a comedy which will be in theaters nationwide July 21st.

Black Buddafly Loses a Wing!

I guess every musical group breaks up sometime, but these three must've set a world record. The sexy ladies of Black Buddafly, who are signed to RSMG, have announced that they will no longer be a trio. The three sisters debuted with their single "Rock-a-Bye" in 2005, and are also known for the song "Bad Girl", a track off the Waist Deep soundtrack featuring Fabolous. Well it seems one of these chicks has been getting bad indeed. Sophie, the eldest sibling is currently four months pregnant out of wedlock and for that reason she has decided to leave the group and return to her home in Hamburg, Germany to prepare for motherhood. Therefore, the twins, Amina and Jazz, will continue on as a duo. Honestly, it won't make a big difference. The remaining two are the only ones who sang anyway, and the only good-looking ones. God Bless, Sophie.

Uncut Gets Cut

After six years, BET has finally dismissed it's long-running show BET: Uncut, an hour long series of music videos featuring highly erotic imagery; mostly g-strings and cellulite. The last episode aired on July 8th. I can't say I'm gonna miss it. I think I'm the only straight black man who doesn't watch that shit. Why would I stay up until 3am just to see some low-budget music video with a rapper I don't know and 4 pregnant strippers shakin' their asses in the camera? I might as well just go buy a porno, at least there's more action in it and I can watch it whenever I please. The show started a couple controversial stories here and there. I know ya'll remember Nelly and his credit card through the buttcrack scandal, and there were tons of protests against it by black female organizations. So, I guess Debra Lee caved and had it chopped off. Whatev'. The comedy in all this is the petition that fans of Uncut have started to keep it on the air. Do they love it that bad? How pathetic. It's funny how niggas won't get together on the fight for AIDS, a disease that's killing us, or the people starving to death in Africa, our very own country, but when they hear that they won't get to see ass & titties on TV they're ready to fight the power.

Foul-mouthed Fergie

Fergie Ferg is in the house, but she's Pea-free this time around. Here's her new song called, "London Bridge (Oh Shit)", off of her upcoming solo album The Dutchess. Of course her boy will.i.am is doing some production and recording for her album, so the Black Eyed Peas are still together. Fergie has already finished filming a video for the first single over in London (where else?) and the album is slated for a September 19th release. I didn't know she cursed so heavily though. I mean, "ass" and "shit", those words don't suprise me when they come out of her mouth, but she went a little further than the regular PG-13 language. Oh, well. I'm vibin' off the song nonetheless. She didn't disappoint. Thanks for the heads up, Ms. Info!

Brooke's Back!

Refusing to accept the title "One Hit Wonder", Brooke Valentine has returned with determination. Gotta love a bitch with some fight in her. Check out the video to her new single "Dope Girl" below, which features fellow H-towner, Pimp C. If Brooke knows how to do anything, it's making that dirty south music. She's got a sick flow over the track accompanied by enough bass to knock the rims off a Chevy. Her new album Physical Education is set for release on October 3rd. Hey Brooke, I'll play Touch Football with you anyday. Holla!

Thank God!

OK, I was sliding through the web-pages of HipHopDX.com and came across a new installment of Solange's DX Dirt. Boy, did I love what I read. According to her, Bow Wow is planning on "retiring" after his next album because he feels he has accomplished enough in his career. Now people, I am seriously starting to wonder if the boy has a mental condtion because he's not normal. Think about this; Bow Clown really believes that he is so talented and so world-famous that he never has to make another album. Does that sit right with you? He's a dumbass. I hope his little announcement wasn't supposed to depress anyone, 'cause it made my motherfuckin' day. Never in my life have I wanted a rumor to be more true than this one. So Bow, I hope your short ass goes through with this and you never put out another song in your life. You will be doing mankind a huge favor. God Bless, you pathetic bastard. What's Ciara's number? I wonder if she got the good news.

New Khaled

Here's a new track off of DJ Khaled's Listennn! album. It's called "Candy Paint" and it features Slim Thugga, Miss Trina, and Chamilitary Man. I personally think the song sounds like shit, but Khaled is from my city, so I'll give him a minor plug. What do ya'll think?

I have good news for all you Beyoncé worshipping motherfuckers. The day you've been drooling over is drawing ever so close. "Deja Vu" will debut on MTV this Thursday, July 13. Yay! So set your clocks, calendars, TiVos, and/or sundials to make sure you're ready for the premiere of Be's new video. I know you don't wanna miss the Sasha transformation.

Also, I heard that T.I. is joining the line of guest appearances on the B'day album. That man is too damn skinny to be so busy all the time. He's gonna hurt himself.

Here's Rihanna on GOTV (some televesion station up in Germany). She's not talking about anything especially urgent, but I'm posting the video anyway. Some people haven't seen this clip of the Bajan Beauty yet and I think she's fine as hell, big head and all. Her accent is heavy though, isn't it? Sounds like she just got off the island. It's OK, I can work with that. ;)

Welcome Home!

The Queen is finally free to rule her Hip-Hop kingdom once again. Kimberly "Lil' Kim" Jones was released from the Federal Detention Center of Philadelphia this morning, where she was lovingly greeted by family, friends, and fans. She will be taken to her home in Alpine, NJ, where she must stay on a 32-day period of house arrest and can't leave unless she has an extreme medical condition. I hope she doesn't spend those 32 days eating, because it looks like she's put on a couple pounds. Oh well, her plastic surgeon will take good care of that. Wait, is that an extreme medical condition? Yeah...it really is.


Another rapper free from the cage is DMX, who was released from prison in Weschester County, NY, after posting a $25,000 bail. He was locked up after missing two court dates to answer to charges of aggravated unlicensed operation of a motor vehicle and seat belt and unsafe lane change violations.

"Sometimes, they write me up, give me a ticket and I'm like, 'Are you serious?'," DMX told AllHipHop.com. "You have to handcuff me just to give me a f**kin' ticket? The same thing that makes you laugh, makes you cry. Sometimes I'm drunk doing 150 miles per hour and they let me go. [Police officer says,] 'My kid loves you. Have a good night.' Sometimes it’s 'You're DMX, please step out of the car [to be arrested].'"

I know, X. The law sucks doesn't it. Ooh, speaking of which, I didn't show up for jury duty today. Damn, jail is not for me.